Better Than I Ever Expected
Joan Price
(Reviewer - Dr. Alma H. Bond)
2006 Seal Press
ISBN: 1580051529

Straight Talk about Sex after Sixty.

Better Than I Ever Expected is a warm, witty & honest book that contends with the challenges & celebrates the delights of older-life sexuality. It asserts that women over sixty are at the top of their game when it comes to enjoying sex. Joan Price's woman-to-woman straight talk transcends the self-help style of other books in the field. She is on a mission to let women her age & older know that they can have the best sex of their lives.

Associate Reviewer Dr. Alma H. Bond writes:

Joan Price’s Better Than I Ever Expected is an original book that needed to be written. I remember when I was a youngster, an older cousin told me, “Sex gets to be less and less frequent with married couples. First it's every day, then every week, then every month. Finally they have sex only on Christmas or their birthday!” I didn't believe her. But it's taken all these years for a clever writer like Joan Price to bring the true story about the sex life of aging couples to the attention of people like my misinformed cousin.

Joan Price demonstrates the kind of courage rarely shown by writers, particularly on the topic of sexuality. She says, “At age fifty-nine, I am having the best sex of my life” (p. 2). When asked what makes her & Robert's sex life so great, Joan answered that they take lots of time, know themselves & their bodies, are wildly in love with each other. She added she got to say whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted. For this day & age, it reminds one of the brave stand taken by Freud a century ago, who first dared to expose his psyche in his dreams. Price describes in great detail the marvelous sex she & Robert, “the man I've been seeking my whole life”(p. 165) experience. Incidentally, Robert is also to be commended for allowing Joan to expose their private life & reveal their most intimate sexual practices. Of course, the fact that the revelations are so flattering to him (i.e. “a vigorous, passionate, sensitive lover...lucky enough to have never needed a little blue pill” p. 231) suggests that other attributes than courage may be involved.

After she agreed to write the book, Joan circulated the following: “Wanted: Interviews with sassy, sexy women, age 60+, who are willing to share feelings and experiences openly and anonymously in a candid, woman-to-woman book” (p. 6). To her surprise, women responded abundantly, & were hungry to share their experiences & reveal the most intimate details of their bodies, fantasies, & relationships. Price uses quotes from these women's responses to illustrate her findings throughout the book.

The book is also helpful in giving advice about certain problems of aging, such as hot flashes, the generation's HRT dispute, painful intercourse, exercises to strengthen muscles to enhance sexual pleasure, preparations to establish intimacy before having sex, the use of sex toys, & solo sex.

But great as their love life appears to be, it does not tell the whole story of Joan & Robert's life together. I received a shock near the end of the book when she revealed that her highly sexed, lusty lover has leukemia & lymphoma. It was the last thing one would expect, in a book celebrating the virtues of passionate love. Joan writes, “We don't know how many more years we will have together. Of course, no couple knows that -- but a cancer diagnosis makes it harder to pretend we have ‘forever’” (pp. 251)... “And as much as we’d like to think we are invincible, these bodies of ours make us look head-on at our own mortality.” One can only hope the cancer will go into remission & allow this loving couple many more happy years together.

Although I greatly admire Price's courage in speaking of the intimate details of her love life, I would have preferred the frankness & honesty she displays about her sexuality to have extended to her psychological background, telling us what in her early experiences prepared her for the sexual adventures she describes so well, what delayed it so long in her life, & in particular what in Robert's upbringing &/or psyche could have brought him to the abyss of his catastrophic illness. Such revelations would have added depth & meaning to their story.

Despite what I consider this shortcoming of Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex after Sixty, it is highly recommended for young people on the verge of discovering the paradise of sexuality, for older couples who have been brain-washed into thinking sex is only for the young, & for those happy lovers of all ages who wish to believe that the bliss of lovemaking will continue as long as they live.

About the Author: Joan Price is a health writer, sexuality advocate, fitness & line-dancing instructor, & motivational speaker who believes that joy isn't age-bound. She has been quoted as an expert in Prevention, Reader's Digest, USA Today, Women's Day, Family Circle, & Oxygen, among others.

More from Joan Price:
Anytime, Anywhere Exercise Book: 300+ Quick and Easy Exercises You Can Do Whenever You Want! with Lawrence Kassman, M.D., F.A.C.E.P.
Truth Is a Bright Star
Complete Idiot's Guide to Online Medical Resources
Complete Idiot's Guide to Online Health & Fitness
Joan Price Says, Yes You Can Get in Shape: Make Exercise a Treat, Not a Treatment.
(01/29/06)

Dr. Alma H. Bond
2006©Alma H. Bond
A RebeccasReads.Com Sr. Associate Reviewer

A RebeccasReads author featured in Authors & Books

Reviewer's Bio:
Dr. Alma Halbert Bond is the author of 11 published books. Her latest, Camille Claudel: a Novel, is currently in publication, & will be reviewed as soon as it comes hot off the presses!
The Deadly Jigsaw Puzzle;
The Tree That Could Fly;
Tales Of Psychology (2005);
I Married Dr. Jekyll And Woke Up Mrs. Hyde (2000);
The Autobiography Of Maria Callas, A Novel (1998);
On Becoming A Grandparent: A Diary of Family Discovery (1994);
Who Killed Virginia Woolf? A Psychobiography (1998);
Profiles of Key West (1996).

She recently recorded her new manuscript, Old Age Is A Terminal Illness, as an audio book.

She is also the author of a just published children's picture book called The Tree That Could Fly.

Dr. Bond teaches Psychology & Writing online at WriterSchool.